Them Weekly

BREAKING: Bird Shits on Bird’s Head by Marty
January 6, 2009, 2:00 pm
Filed under: The Blue Jay, The Hawk


Another troubling case of bird-on-bird violence broke out at the marsh this morning, when The Hawk brazenly shat on The Blue Jay’s head in broad daylight. Tensions in the bird community are high, with most local fowl afraid to venture out of their nests. This is the third such occurrence in these early days of 2009, putting us on pace to more than triple last year’s total of 52 shittings. Local authorities remain on high alert.


hareoin overdose by dwgc
December 27, 2008, 11:14 am
Filed under: The Hawk, The Rabbit


The Rabbit has been spotted out partying around The Hawks new nest in recent weeks. Last night he was found face down in a field. Could this be a case of fowl play?

Bach Pad by dwgc
December 12, 2008, 1:08 pm
Filed under: The Hawk


Having recently split with his long-time girlfriend, The Hawk has built a new nest in a much trendier area of the forest. Built on one of the top branches and made entirely of recycled materials,  this 0.0045 arce nest has an amazing lake view and is the ideal location for ruffling some feathers.